Flowering fields in the rain.

I used to think I was a patient person, but lately I’ve come to find I’m unable to wait a moment for a reply….Maybe it was the content of the letter/text/e-mail, but to me it is irrelivant.

Throughout the day I pose myself with analytic questions, not saying that any of this makes sense to you the reader but I’m starting to discover so much within that it’s not just about me anymore, this dives into the realms of others beliefs and life and espcially love.

I’ve very good at putting myself into a situation that in which A) I told myself I wouldn’t do or B) that I told someone else I wouldn’t do but went ahead and did it anyway…sooner rather than later they find out or I tell them and boom, this is something I can only call a bloody chemical explosion as I have not yet found a suitable claus.

For instance: I told someone I love (A close friend) That I would not do something. Now I went ahead and did it. well kinda its happening now. Now the friend doesn’t know, but I’m tied on why I can’t tell them but i feel I should tell them if not for them but also my sanity….but the a third person is drawn into the equation which mean I’m not able to do much but what I’m doing well actually I could stop what I was doing but where is the fun in that???

See you try follow the pattern here because I’m lost….AND it’s my life.